Our expectations can easily set us up for failure. If we set them crazy high, we are bound to be disappointed. If we set them crazy low, our lives become dull and without quality.
It can be our expectations of people. It can be our expectations of events we attend.
Take myself and Grumpy Guy as an example. I call him Grumpy Guy, because whenever we go to visit, he is in a grumpy mood. We were getting ready to go to them when I was lamenting to my wife that I simply did not feel like going through this all again. That’s when she commented that perhaps I should not focus on him and his moods, but instead turn my attention to what I can do to make the visit a success. She had a point, so I did some self-coaching. What if I can move from my position of judgement, and move into my green state brain energy of curiosity and caring? What if I, rather than judge, try to find out why he is grumpy all the time . . . and what I can do to help him find a better way? By doing so, I can be happy in the moment and, if I can help him in the long run, joy will follow for both of us.
If we set our expectations too high for a forthcoming event, we set ourselves up to be disappointed. It’s just human nature. As we prepare and get ready, I can easily get excited of what is possible and how great things are going to be. And then you get there, and things are just simply not the way you wanted it to be. I’ve learnt (and I’m an old guy, so have had plenty of time to learn) to rather enjoy the journey of the expectations as well as the actual event at the end. It’s fabulous to get things ready in anticipation and to enjoy those preparations with friends and loved ones. What are you going to wear? What are you going to bring? When you then arrive and things are not one hundred percent to expectation, you are better equipped to go with the flow and create your own bubble of fun and joy around you and your party. You have ensured that your joy is protected!