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Deconstructing Ashtanga, Reconstructing Me

Excerpt from an e-mail I received from Aude pictured above:
 

"For the past 3 years I had the same very intense summer job of teaching circus in the mountains and this season, despite the extra covid pandemic angst, is the first season I spend without relapsing into my old eating patterns. This summer of 2020 I stopped getting up at 6 AM to do my 2 hours after a month and decided that a half hour was enough. The last two weeks, most mornings were only conscious breathing for 15 minutes because I felt sleep was more important at this point (and the last three day were just sluggish because parties). 

 And not even once have I collapsed into those dreadful bulimia crises. 

Being so hard on myself with asana and spiritual practices in general was my own trap of feeling satisfied (I’ve been so good practicing everyday the last week), and numbing myself with tons of food until feeling sick was the reward (which reminds me of that meme trend on ashtangi accounts about filling themselves up with so much food before Moon days…)."

See the full post here

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